Our baby girl was born last month and we want to share a bit about her homecoming!

For a bit more backstory to being matched for adoption, please see this blog post.

The day before our daughter was born we received the text we had been waiting for: her mother* had gone into labor! We wrapped up the things we needed to do and by mid-afternoon we were on the road to Spokane. The day seemed to drag on endlessly as we traveled and spent time with family. The baby was born in the wee hours of the morning and was described as healthy, calm and alert. The plan was for Mother and Child to be at the hospital together and for us to take custody when they were both discharged which was expected to be the following day since it was an uneventful delivery. The day she was born we blissfully ran errands: grocery shopping for a week or so, gathering a few more baby items we thought would be helpful and visiting a few friends. We had another eagerly anxious night in anticipation of meeting the little one we hoped to adopt the next day.

We didn’t know what time discharge for mom and baby would happen so we decided to stay close to the hospital for most of the day. We got coffee at a local coffee shop but at about 11:30am we received a text that the mother was having second thoughts and reconsidering her choice to place her child with us. To say this took the wind from our sails would be an understatement! After our initial dismay, Chris and I recited truth to each other: this baby doesn’t belong to us, God does not owe us children, the ideal situation for this baby would be to stay with her mother if that’s what her mother wanted and if she could care for the child. And we prayed hard, painful prayers that God would do what’s best, no matter what. It was a cold dreary day but we went to a park and walked around, sometimes praying, sometimes crying but mostly silent. We were in agony and I think that the mother was also in agony. To put her child that she had bonded with in utero and fell in love with at birth in the care of practical strangers was a horrendous decision to make. But she had to decide. The baby had jaundice and needed another night at the hospital and the mother needed to be discharged if she wasn’t going to stay with the baby.

A little after 5pm Chris and I were at the park again, in our car listening to worship music, specifically the City Alight song “The Goodness of Jesus” when the mother’s friend called and told us that she would like to move forward with the adoption. The goodness of Jesus, indeed! We hadn’t even hung up the phone when we sped towards the hospital with renewed excitement and an even greater joy.

We met our baby girl for the first time and her mother in the hospital room. We didn’t know what to expect but we saw instantly that the mother was at peace with her decision. Sad, certainly, but confident. We held our daughter for the first time, looking into her sweet face. Her mother was discharged and we settled into the hospital room for our girl to have a night under the blue lights. Chris changed a diaper for the first time and we both had some skin to skin time – juggling her and a blue light. My smartwatch told me that I slept for an hour that night but I was so happy that I honestly didn’t feel it.

Thankfully her jaundice levels went down overnight to a level low enough for us to be discharged from the hospital. We stayed at Chris’ parents for a few nights and we were able to come home to Oregon about a week after she was born once the interstate adoption paperwork was processed.

We love our little girl! Our daughter is snugly, generally calm and extremely cute (I didn’t make her so it doesn’t feel prideful to say how beautiful she is!). No, we’re not getting a lot of sleep but Chris and I have worked out a schedule where we both get at least a partial night sleep – being on formula means that Dad can feed just as easily as Mom can. Thankfully she is sleeping more at night and is generally more alert during the day.

Chris and I celebrate our 10 year anniversary soon. We have been through a lot of highs and lows but this lovely girl is the sweetest gift from God we’ve been given in our marriage and it’s a joy to see each other dote on our daughter and work to love each other and her well amidst sleeplessness and even sin.

We were never promised a child and we certainly couldn’t earn or deserve her, however, we are continually rejoicing in God’s extravagantly good gift to us. Eventually we do hope to adopt another child (so if anyone hears about another mother considering adoption, please let us know!) but for now we are basking in baby snuggles and delighting in her as she grows.

He gives the barren woman a home, making her the joyous mother of children. Praise the Lord! Psalm 113:9 ESV

*I am referring to our daughter’s biological mother as just “mother” here. Even though I am her mama and caring for her everyday needs, her biological mother will always be her mother. My desire is to honor that relationship so that as our daughter grows, she will always know that she is loved by her biological family and adoption came as a result of that love not an absence of that love.

**We intend to be very private with the details about our child. We will post a select few photos online and only share with people we know – there are too many creeps out there for us to put her face out there for public consumption. And her identity and story are HERS to share as she wants in the future. If you want to see what she looks like, please text me and I’ll be happy to share the latest pic of her with you if you want!

We have most of what we need (including clothes through about 9 months) and our church will be hosting a baby shower for us in a few weeks.  However, if you wish to get a baby gift, we do have a registry on Amazon that can be found here.